Nicht alles hier ist ein Zitat
Zitate als fortune-Datenbank herunterladen— How Harry Potter Should Have Ended
- Dumbledore: I'd like to introduce our new teacher for defense against the dark arts: Professor Gandalf!
- Gandalf: YOU! SHALL NOT! PASS!
- Dumbledore: Oh, that's a little harsh. Classes haven't even started.
— Simone GiertzI'm not giving up yet because I'm a woman on a mission to slightly improve her jigsaw puzzle experience. And I will stop at nothing.
— Girl GeniusMy son, this is Mechanicsburg!. If a big iron statue comes banging at the door asking for sanctuary — sanctuary it gets!
And no questions asked!
— The First Horror Movie Written Entirely By BotsHe's no whale. He's an underwater cop.
— Daniel StenbergI have since been working with HTTP pretty much daily. For twenty-five years.
If someone tries to tell you that HTTP is an easy or simple protocol, don’t believe them.
— Advent of Code 2021, day 10Syntax error in navigation subsystem on line: all of them
— FefeEndlich! Ransomware in Rust!
Damit hat die Ransomware ein höheres Zuverlässigkeitsniveau als das Betriebssystem darunter.
— Josh (Let's Game It Out)I was playing as intended, I have no idea what happened!
— Josh (Let's Game It Out)Let's see: We need a serving table, a table table table and a bench bench bench.
— Worst Premade EverEllis: We are back on the HMS Cunning Stunt!
Jake: Yup. The Cunning Stunt has taken off! I'm currently driving… the Cunning Stunt… and… we're driving the… Cunning Stunt… around this planetoid… taking care not to fumble any words in the process.
— DSA-RollenspielrundeIch hätte noch ASP um dich zu heilen. Ich muss nur an Borbarad vorbeikommen.
— Methodisch Inkorrekt Folge 210Ich habe gerade ein Problem. Der Kater trinkt das Experiment.
— UndertaleYou're filled with determination…
— Alphys (Undertale)Asgore left me five messages today.
Four about everyone being angry. One about this cute teacup he found that looks like me.
Thanks, Asgore.
— GAG 340: Tauben, die Raketen steuern und KybernetikWas ist Podcast? Podcast ist Cyberradio.
— Yoda, The Empire Strikes BackWars not make one great.
— Josh (Let's Game It Out)It looks like our Journey begins in an… escape pod. With all the modern essentials of living: e-mail and air conditioning.
— Josh (Let's Game It Out)Now the game starts with one basic container. And in it we've got some essentials, like some kind of seed, as well as some space food, space oxygen and space water.
But we don't have very much extra space space.
— Undertaleall i know is… seeing what comes next… i can't afford not to care anymore
— Undyne (Undertale)What I like about you is that you're PASSIONATE! You're ANALYTICAL!!
It doesn't matter what it is! YOU CARE ABOUT IT!!
100-PERCENT!! AT MAXIMUM POWER!!!
— xkcdAnts have reverse chemtrails – regular citizens spraying chemicals everywhere they go to control the government.
— No BoilerplateA fast executing language that crashes all the time is like a supercar… that crashes all the time.
— Iroh (Avatar: The Last Airbender)It is important to draw wisdom from many different places. If you take it from only one place, it becomes rigid and stale.
— True Facts: TarantulasOnce the male finds a hidey-hole with a potential mate, he has to convince the female to come out and party.
Now it might not look like much, but this is sort of like an upside-down version of the balcony scene from Romeo and Juliet, but they both have bongos and Juliet is potentially a pissed-off cannibal.
— 93% of Paint Splatters are Valid Perl ProgramsFigure 6 represents the string “gggijgziifiiffif”, which by pure coincidence happens to accurately represent the authors’ verbal reaction upon learning that “unquoted strings” were a feature intentionally included in the Perl language.
— Worst Premade Everit's our 47,727th youtube subscriber special stream (we thought we'd be on 50k by now!)
— UndertaleDespite everything, it's still you.
— The Guardian[The security minister] was there to talk about the prime minister’s new fraud strategy (fighting it, not perpetrating it).
— True Facts: The Curious Adaptations of SharksMany sharks can swim quite quickly. This comes in handy, because sharks live in places where there are sharks.
— Bernard (Day of the Tentacle)Well, you know what they say: if you want to save the world, you got to push a few old ladies down the stairs.
— UndertaleSpider Bake Sale
All proceeds go to real spiders.
— Universe Song (Monty Python's The Meaning of Life)So remember, when you're feeling very small and insecure
How amazingly unlikely is your birth
And pray that there's intelligent life somewhere up in space
'Cause there's bugger-all down here on Earth!
— Wikipedia-Artikel zu TwitterMusk hatte angekündigt, Twitter zu einer Plattform der Redefreiheit zu machen. Er ließ nach der Übernahme eine Reihe von Benutzerkonten löschen, die ihn kritisierten und parodierten.
— Josh (Let's Game it Out)Yes, it's a nightmare, but it's my nightmare.
— A Crap Guide to D&D [5th Edition] - WarlockBoy, I wish I could cast spells, but all I got is an expendable first-born child and a willingness to work under a questionable immoral arcane master 'til the end of time!
— QuelleWarum heißt es Hackerangriff und nicht Schlingel Sign-On?
— Casey KreerDie Verwaltung sollte wegkommen von diesem PDF-Fetisch.
— Joycelyn EldersWe've tried ignorance for a thousand years. It's time we try education.
— True Facts: Incredible Crab StoriesI mean but come on. This looks like two buddies having fun together. Like Calvin and Hobbes. If Hobbes was firmly attached to Calvin's ass.
— Josh (Let's Game it Out)What a horrible thing we've done to the landscape. I love it!
— 37C3Be eggsalad to each other!
— rewbossThe fact is that ever since the invention of writing and very possibly since the dawn of humanity itself different cultures have migrated, intermingled, split off and recombined and there is no period of human history when this has not been the case.
— Raymond Chen über SoftRAMThey implemented only one compression algorithm.
It was
memcpy
.In other words, their vaunted patent-pending compression algorithm was “copy the data uncompressed.”
— Porting libyaml to Safe Rust: Some ThoughtsIt isn't "wrong", just different. Unnecessarily difficult in many ways, but in other ways refreshingly straightforward, so long as you can keep the cosmic horror only just barely out of sight.
— Terry Pratchett, HogfatherIt's amazing how good governments are, given their track record in almost every other field, at hushing up things like alien encounters.
— Ed Yong, Die Erstaunlichen Sinne der TiereIn wissenschaftlichen Untersuchungen zur Lichtverschmutzung dient die Abkürzung ALAN häufig für nächtliches künstliches Licht (artificial light at night). Leider lesen sich deshalb viele Artikel so, als würden sie sich passiv-aggressiv gegen einen Menschen namens Alan richten […]. »ALAN kann sich auf eine große Vielfalt nachtaktiver Tiere auswirken«, heißt es in einem Aufsatz. »Schon geringe Aktivitäten von ALAN können deutliche biologische Auswirkungen haben«, behauptet ein anderer.
— QuelleLinguistics is a portmanteau of Linguini and Breadsticks.
— The Name of All ThingsThe guests wanted answers. What was that noise? Had it scared the horses? Were the horses all right? Had the weather worsened? Did anyone check the horses?
— Parachute use to prevent death and major trauma when jumping from aircraft: randomized controlled trialParachute use did not reduce death or major traumatic injury when jumping from aircraft in the first randomized evaluation of this intervention. However, the trial was only able to enroll participants on small stationary aircraft on the ground […].